Monday, March 17, 2014

My friend & I are not in talking terms these days. We shared a bond but the recent duels with him on Facebook regarding' The Great Indian Politics' has taken toll on our friendship. He calls me names "AAPTARD" "Kejru ka Birju" etc etc. In return I try to maintain the composure like #Yogendra Yadav but end up putting on display my illustrious vocab of Desi cuss words which btw are less offensive then being called #AAPtard .

It’s startling to observe the mental state of Indian youth which few years ago was living in oblivion and today debates for days on every single comment/video/sting over numerous pages on Facebook. I can only imagine Admins/readers of these pages sitting cozy on their beanbags with chips and vodka/massala chai having good times just watching the show Aaptard/#Congtards/#BJPtards {if such word exists} savor each other. Reminds me of Joker’s words ‘You see, their morals, their code, it’s a bad joke. Dropped at the first sign of trouble. They’re only as good as the world allows them to be. I’ll show you. When the chips are down, these… these civilized people, they’ll eat each other. See, I’m not a monster. I’m just ahead of the curve.’

There is a whiff of fresh air(#AAP) to Indian politics which we know in interest of time is trying to run even when they couldn't take fully controlled baby steps. All this ridiculous items on which we spend hours debating is not important as long as party asks legitimate questions. Why do we get rattled if they ask the correct question to our favorite leader(#Modi)? Let them answer the questions and if needed ask questions in return in public domain till every penny is accounted for. It’s very important that someone is causing tremors/asking questions/ dragging common people to governance and its evident that the age old parties are flustered by the same. Good for democracy. Good for us because if not a good leader we might have night watchman in the form of new party so that again after 10 years of Governance , we don’t uncover 2G,3G,Baba G scams and then spend another 10 years of time & money recovering the loss.

It’s important is to keep this idea alive . All I request you is to keep this flame burning…after 65 years of Independence, a new party in such record time has managed to build such big fan base on issue based politics which has changed the entire dynamics of Indian politics .It took 65 years for a man..for a party to emerge from our generation..a generation which has witnessed 84 riots, Babri Masjid, Godhra. You never know what to expect from this new generation..a generation which is born on Facebook, learns to walk on twitter and bitch at Starbucks whose biggest problem ‘Dewd wifi here sucks man’.

It’s not about wether you vote for this new party or not in this election. It’s your personal choice and I respect that but that doesn't mean in this process kill the idea..kill the man(#Kejriwal #ArvindKejriwal)..like Harvey Dent of Gotham City, amiable and courteous district attorney who was reduced to ashes by the JOKER.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Good old days..clicking Photographs used to be the job of a “Photographer”. ..man with most sophisticated/big camera in town. His camera Bag and Tripod used to be bigger than his camera. Even for clicking Passport photographs he would give ten instructions dus baar mundi ko haath laga ke “Beta not that stiff” “relax karo”..will touch your head and tilt at his favorite angle. For me that was BAD Touch L. I hated it and when I used to be almost ready he would blind me with a flash which would be good enough to play a Day/Night cricket match. Finally this would get over..You think? I would hear him telling my dad “Aapka beta aankh band kar leta hai ” Wat wat? You snitch!! What do you expect me to stare into your flash machine & grow up to star in Bansali’s movie. Dad would give me ‘that’ look and I would find myself on that doomed stool reliving “Beta not that stiff” “relax karo” torture again.

Now with every Tom, Ramesh & Harry moving around with their Canons and Nikons D 235..EOSX with  123.5475 MM blah blah lens and machines.I can just imagine the poor photographer’s plight. Shaadi biyaah main  this so called “Photographer Bhaiya” is the one with the most outdated machine trying to compete with these Tom Ramesh & Harry and their costly equipment. I know it’s kind of sad impacts their livelihood but #Devil in me says “Payback time” . I told ya Mere Tom Ramesh & Harry aayenge. Feels like walking up to them and saying ““Bhaiya itna stiff nahi..thoda tilt karo apna sar ..ISO kitna rakha…areey shutter speed gadbad hai ” hahahaha J

Sunday, August 04, 2013

दुश्मन : चल ना बे क्लास बंक करते हैं..अँग्रेज़ी ही तो है..अँग्रेज़ी तो अपने नश नश मैं हैं..आई गो ..तू कम..चल मैं तेरे को मस्त जगह ले चलता हु ..नयी बिल्डिंग मैं 
विनीत : मरवाएगा तू,ये तो  मस्त जगह पूरा स्कूल दीखता है यहाँ से..मस्त 
दुश्मन : स्कूल छोड़ ..प्रिन्सिपल सर भी दीखते हैं..वो देख सामने से आ रहे हैं..कूद कूद..जंप कुकुकुकुकुकुद्..
विनीत : यार बहुत उँचा है....मैं नि कुद रहा...
दुश्मन : लोड नही, भाई पे भरोसा रख...
विनीत : जब मैं कुदा वो सुअर  भाग चुका था
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
विनीत : अबे सीनियर आ रहे हैं ..अंदर चलो रूम के ..अंदर
सीनियर : नाम क्या है
विनीत : विनीत सर
सीनियर : आबे तू सर है तो हम क्या है बे..मरो साले को  .
दुश्मन : हा हा हअह हा हा हा  
सीनियर : तू क्यूँ हंसा बे....इसको भी मारो 
विनीत : हा हा हअह हा हा हा  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
दुश्मन : अबे विनीत कुछ समझ नही आ रह है..भाई कुछ पढ़ा दे...
विनीत : कोई ना..बोल कौन सा चॅप्टर...भाई कुछ नही पड़ा सब पढ़ा दे
विनीत : आबे सुअर..कल एग्ज़ॅम है...एक शाम मैं कैसे सब पढ़ा दु..चल बैठ
दुश्मन : देखना तेरा भाई टॉप करेगा इस बार 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
दुश्मन : आबे दुसरे स्वाल का जवाब  दीखा ना बे
विनीत : मैं लिख रहा हु..साथ साथ मैं कॉपी कर ले
दुश्मन : (आफ्टर 30 मिनिट्स )..अबे कितना लंबा आन्सर है..लगता है इस बार टॉप कर जाऊँगा  
विनीत : कमीने मैं क्वेस्चन 4 पे हूँ ...
दुश्मन : क्या...अरे बताना था ना पांडु...लोड ना ले..तू लिख तू लिख तुझे टॉप करना है...मैं अड्जस्ट कर लेता हूँ
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
विनीत : ओये मुझे ये बंदी पसंद है ...तेरे ब्रांच मैं है इंट्रो करा ना..भाई का भाई नही है  क्या ?
दुश्मन : टेन्षन ना ले तूने बोल दिया समझो हो गया....भाई है अपना
(अगले दिन पूरा मेकॅनिकल  ब्रांच ,जहाँ से भी वो गुजरती )
भाभी  भाभी  भाभी  भाभी  जी नमस्ते भाभी भाभी  
बंदी : मुझे नही मालूम था तुम ऐसे लड़के हो..
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
विनीत : ओये  गाड़ी की चाभी दे ना, तेरी भाभी से मिलने जाना है 
दुश्मन : भाभी से मिल चाहे ससुर से..पेट्रोल भरवा देना ..रिज़र्व मैं है. सुन उसकी कोई रूम मेट है क्या? 
विनीत :- कर दी ना छिछोरी बात ..चाभी ला
(मिल के आने के बाद)
विनीत : तेरी गाड़ी को दीखाता क्यूँ नही मेकॅनिक को..कितना  पेट्रोल पीती है..फुल टॅंक करवाया था..आते आते रिज़र्व मैं आ गयी 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
विनीत : ओये तेरा भाई अब बेरोज़गार नही रहा,सेलेक्ट हो गया ..तू घर नही गया कामीने रात के 01 बज रहे हैं
दुश्मन : अबे हम जानते थे इंटरव्यू तो तुम निकाल ही लोगे , चेले किसके हो..सोचा साथ चलेंगे   
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

दुश्मन तो इसके बाद भी कई बने पर ऐसे कमीने नही ....सालों ने कभी दोस्तों की कमी खलने ही नही दी

इस कहानी के सभी पात्रा एवं घ्टनाए काल्पनिक नही है,जिसका किसी ना  किसी जीवित व्यक्ति से पक्का संबंध है,अगर होता  है तो उसे
मात्र एक सयोंग ना समझे !!

Sunday, July 28, 2013

मेरा ख़ूँ करने से पहले उसने नकाब कर लिया
उसकी चाहत कि इससे बेहत्तर निशानी क्या होगी   



मेरे कत्ल का खंजर मेरे सिराहने रख देना
तेरी याद आए तो दो नजर देखा करेंगे     



मेरे कपड़े, मेरा खाना, खिलोने.. दिन भर भागती रहती है
मैं थक के सो भी जाता है,मेरी माँ जागती  रहती है        

Monday, May 13, 2013


अपने क़ातिल से ही हमने दोस्ती कर ली ,उससे बेहतर कोई और हमे समझता कहाँ था विनीत !!

Wednesday, May 08, 2013

Watching cricket match along with mom...With IPL all around us..I remember those days. Those days most  household just had one television set and no cricinfo or the online portals showing live matches. This meant Inspite of declaring well in advance my match schedule.. I had to fight the battle for TV slot on that day..a gruesome battle between cricket and “Saas bahu saga”. And I remb those days Tulsi Virani could make India come to a halt  in precisely the same way as Sachin still does when he is on 90s. Holy mother of all cows… I still remb the day when Mihir Virani was about to come back to life !!!

Momaaj mera match hai ..day night hai..I would need TV in the evening” …Its OK..it all yours..when will you grow up ? Fair enough…I declared it in the morning..Now I can rest in peace and I would get the slot. So you think? You folks are not aware of Guerrilla army ..staying  low throughout the day but hijacking the remote just 30 minutes before the match… “My sisters”.. I could never understand was it just to irritate me or they too really had something to watch..And that led to another battle of remote Vs manual changing channels from Tv..they used to change using remote..I used to manually switch channels …and then later stand infront of TV to block remote signal and then two of us fighting to stand in front of TV. Yeah my sisters always played by rules..never did both of them pounce on me at same time..it was always one on one coz the other one would always run to complain and call Mom . And here comes mother India..we both would go on together and this is how it used to sound “isne maine pehle..mujhe cricket lekin main..isne toda..dhaka..maine tune…JKUgjk YFbuiy bygyghkyg ” somehow Mom used to always figure out the story from these scrambled words. “Didi badi hai na..how did you push her…Sorry bolo !! But Mom I told you in the morning …I would need remote..Sorry bolo pehle…
OK Sorry!! And the younger one would spice things up..Mom OK sorry bola..Sorry nahi..Sorry bolo..OK sorry kya hota hai !!

Mom would then ask my sis to handover the remote to me and finally I would switch channel to the ever mesmerizing voice of Sri Sri Sri Ravi Shatri..you know what you can hear that guy even if you keep your TV on Mute . Finally…I can watch match in peace..So you think? Guerrilla army still won’t buzz from the room and sit alongside…and precisely after 10 minutes…make a loud call to Mom..”Isne jhooth bola..match abhi shuru bhi nahi hua hai…isko sab dekhna hai log kaise ghus rahe hain stadium main …sab dekh lo..we could have seen one episode”…Phata poster and phir se nikli Mother India..”Bunty beta de dena remote abhi match chalu nahi hua hai toh..tu acha beta hai na de de”..and I would fall for the trap and give the remote with a promise from  them that I need it back when the first ball is bowled…That promise was never kept and I always ended up missing first over.

When you just think its all over the bell rings and Dad returns from grocery shopping and wud in Dad like heavy tone "Beta zara news lagaaoo " aaarrgghhh Moooooooooooooooooommmm...he is easy..mom always takes care..& he would know that I have permission from Supreme Court..

Ab nahi dunga main kissi ko..phir miss ho gya Srinath ka overAnd I get watching.. Guerrilla army finally leaves the room…as if their part of damage was done…Half way through the match…I would see my mother sliding from the kitchen to the room with ..my food all set on the plateGhee lega BetaHaan haan…. My loving Mom..I take the food and again fall for the trap.. And the a rapid fire would go putting Derek O Brien to shame…”Kiska Match hai”  “India -SL”  “Pura Dekhega??” “Watt…nahi aadha dekhunga aur aadha aankh band karke imagine kar lunga..ofcourse” “Kaun Jeet raha hai??” “It’s  just started but I think we are in good shape ” “Srinath ka kandha theek ho gya [The day that guy dislocated his shoulder while bowling..my mom got emotionally connected with him] Haan Ho gya” “Tunga Tunga bhi hai kya[ths is how she calls Ranatunga]” “Haan hai…” And very very softly ..she would slip in a queryAd ke beech main ek baar change kar de..woh Tusli ghar se nialne walee the aaj…”

Moooommmmmmm…yeah lo..tumhi log dekho..I don’t wana se..One day ..one day One day I ask and you guys…I am not seeing and I used to walk away inspite of her attempts to stop me. She would switch back to Tusli Virani whose been trying to leave her house for a month but still could only reach to the dining hall after gazillion episodes…silent enemies would giggle and join Mom and I would go back to my room.

Bunty..India jeet gayi…dekhaa tu nahi dekhta hai to jeet jaati hai..bas aise hi kiya kar…..”

Now everyone's got a TV in their room and a laptop/tablet/smart phone in hand..I watch match on TV/online..and at the same time read commentary on cricinfo..Guerrilla army is hooked to their laptops..Dad is stuck in between..he is got a laptop but he is not too much into it ..moreover he never had any TV slot..if Mom's generous..he is allowed to check headlines ones in a day... Guerrilla army and I have moved on and love the power of technology but Mom is still the good old fashion days... Successors of Tusli Virani are still trying to leave their house..Mom has finally started to realize that these Tulsi's are never gonaa leave their home... She's got all TV slots for her..but she doesn't like the empty drawing room with all TV slots for her...


Haaapy Mother's Day Moma !! Cricket has never been the same.....

Monday, April 15, 2013



कोई  है  जो  तुम्हे  जगा  रहा  है 
इक  नयी  दिशा  इक  नयी  राह  बता  रहा  है 
तुम  साथ  दो  न  दो ..वोह  दीवाना  ना  रुकेगा
मनज़िल  न  मिली .न  सही … राह  मैं  दम  तोड़  देगा …

वक़्त  है  गुज्जर  जाएगा 
फिर  शब्   है …फिर  सेहर  आयएगा
तुम !! हाँ  तुम !! मैं  तुमसे  पूछता  हूँ 
आने  वाले  कल  को  जवाब  क्या  दोगे
लड़खड़ाते   भूके   नंगे  भविष्य   से  क्या  कोहोगे

तुमने तो फैसला सुना दिया
इस देश  कुछ नहीं हो सकता बता दिया
चार फोटो लाइक की..दो तीन पोस्ट डाले और हो गया
पर जान लो आज जो  तुम सो गए सुनहरे भारत  का सपना भी सो गया 

परेशां तो  तुम  भी  हो विनीत …शिकायत  भी  करते  हो 
साथ  चलने  मैं आज  फिर  क्यूँ कदम  डगमगा  रहा  है
कोई  है  जो  तुम्हे  जगा  रहा  है
एक  नयी  दिशा  एक  नयी  राह  बता  रहा  है !!



"Yeah galat hua" "Naa Jaane kaise darinde"...."Aise logon ko phansi honi chiaye"..."Bechari Ladki".."Hume kuch karna chaiyee".."please share this on FB"...Aur Kuch? Aur Kuch bolna hain kissi ko..karna hai kissi ko. My pen bleeds with pain today when i begin to jolt my thoughts/anger/frustration on this topic. I will keep it short because i am sure in no time anger in me would overpower my thoughts and my words.

Gals Its your fight. No one is going to fight for you.You don't need no one to fight for you.. If they do..then they would dictate their terms.Enough of living on their terms. It's about your rite to live free not just as a citizen but even basic..as a Human Being. We are with you with our heads hanging in shame as we have failed you yet another time . We failed..we failed ..No point looking at us...You are powerful..You are independent..You form 30 %(approx) of workforce..bring down the damn city..entire country to the hault...stop going to schools/colleges/offices/workplace till tangible actions are taken ...Do it for you...Do it for your friends/daughters/sisters.Do it for my two sisters who travel the same streets as you do..Do it now!! I am sorry...Do it as we couldn't !!



जिसका मकान था वो तो कभी रहा ही नही विनीत
किराएदार ना जाने कितने आए गए !!     



इतनी खामोशी से कत्ल करते हैं वो हमारे जज़्बातो का विनीत 

कम्भख्त दिनों तक गूँज सुनाई देती  है !!     

गायब हुए वो जिंदगी से कुछ इस तरह विनीत
ख्वाबों मैं ही जो दिखते थे अब हर्सू नज़र आते हैं !!